FaceBook. Exposed.
Behold the World of Possibilty!
Facebook; a place where one can find out who or what one will marry, what kind of bride and/or groom one will be, how many kids one will have, what is for lunch, which color one is, which supercar one is, which assassin, which STD, which fruit one is.. One need not look for life's answers any further. Facebook is here! If one is wondering where one's inner llama is, what outfit one is, which constellation one resembles, which bathroom fixture describes one best, which fictitious cartoon personality truly explains one, which beverage one is, how bitchy one is, what one’s actual age is (the birth certificate lies!) and which Bold and the Beautiful character one is, Facebook is one’s ‘bastt fraand’. Facebook tells one whether one has been blessed with beauty or brains or both. Facebook serves as a mental, social and spiritual gauge for one and all. One may discover whether one is deranged in the “Choose one: Chainsaw or Basket of warm, fuzzy, adorable kittens” questionnaire.
If one has always wondered whether one liked peas or not, Facebook shall come to the rescue. Facebook goes as far as to provide one with pets that one can confine to one’s profile and thus not agitate Mummy and Daddy. One may pet, feed, kick, swipe, slaughter and pimp said pets. One may also stroke one’s ego by creating groups dedicated to the greatness of one. One may wear one’s heart on one’s personal message. One may put up flattering pictures of one and then claim that one looks “hideous and FAAAAAAAT”. One may change one’s number and give out the new one in one’s personal message and complain about crank callers and frandshippers in one’s personal message the very next day.
Even though how long one will live and when one will die do not quite seem to fit, what is a decade long discrepancy when the source is Facebook? Facebook knows all. All ones are slaves to Facebook. It controls ones’ destinies and yesterday's brunch. It tells one how one is feeling now and what tree one will be this time next year. It also makes it possible for one to become a vampire and/or werewolf (for the really quiet kids sitting at the back of the class and muttering to their tellytubby pencil cases).
Facebook is underrated. Facebook owns all. All hail Facebook.
*source: Ruquia, my friend from Pakistan
PS: The author was mad while writing this, so dont take it seriously
Facebook; a place where one can find out who or what one will marry, what kind of bride and/or groom one will be, how many kids one will have, what is for lunch, which color one is, which supercar one is, which assassin, which STD, which fruit one is.. One need not look for life's answers any further. Facebook is here! If one is wondering where one's inner llama is, what outfit one is, which constellation one resembles, which bathroom fixture describes one best, which fictitious cartoon personality truly explains one, which beverage one is, how bitchy one is, what one’s actual age is (the birth certificate lies!) and which Bold and the Beautiful character one is, Facebook is one’s ‘bastt fraand’. Facebook tells one whether one has been blessed with beauty or brains or both. Facebook serves as a mental, social and spiritual gauge for one and all. One may discover whether one is deranged in the “Choose one: Chainsaw or Basket of warm, fuzzy, adorable kittens” questionnaire.
If one has always wondered whether one liked peas or not, Facebook shall come to the rescue. Facebook goes as far as to provide one with pets that one can confine to one’s profile and thus not agitate Mummy and Daddy. One may pet, feed, kick, swipe, slaughter and pimp said pets. One may also stroke one’s ego by creating groups dedicated to the greatness of one. One may wear one’s heart on one’s personal message. One may put up flattering pictures of one and then claim that one looks “hideous and FAAAAAAAT”. One may change one’s number and give out the new one in one’s personal message and complain about crank callers and frandshippers in one’s personal message the very next day.
Even though how long one will live and when one will die do not quite seem to fit, what is a decade long discrepancy when the source is Facebook? Facebook knows all. All ones are slaves to Facebook. It controls ones’ destinies and yesterday's brunch. It tells one how one is feeling now and what tree one will be this time next year. It also makes it possible for one to become a vampire and/or werewolf (for the really quiet kids sitting at the back of the class and muttering to their tellytubby pencil cases).
Facebook is underrated. Facebook owns all. All hail Facebook.
*source: Ruquia, my friend from Pakistan
PS: The author was mad while writing this, so dont take it seriously
posted by Rohit Mahajan at
2:45 PM
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